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Re: This Lightning Storm, Chapter One: Gilded With Ice
You talk about how when she uses it, it leaves an inky stain. Perhaps in the process of getting ready for college she performs some magic and worries over the ...
Jul 17, 2014 -
Re: Don't Be Afraid To Be Who You Are (Chapter 1) *EDITED*
This won't really count as a review, because I think the changes you made were wonderful! Your sensory language is great! Good job.
Jul 13, 2014 -
Re: Equal and Opposite Chapter One; Many a Night Spent as a Bat.
Note: This review has been deleted
Jun 18, 2014 -
Re: Tittie Traitor
I don't think I have ever laughed at a poem before. That was pure genius. I can't wait to read more of your work.
Jun 16, 2014 -
Re: A nice joke speech!
Well I for one think Burger King tastes way better than McDonalds and Wendys. I agree with Nate, you should make this into a pointless story like Jay and Silent ...
Feb 4, 2010 -
Re: Four Letters
Yes I think this is greatly improved. It makes a lot more sense, and I think you have rectified the pattern/rhyme. My only critique at this point is your punctuation. ...
Jan 13, 2010 -
Re: A Sound of the Wind
Good job! I am very impressed at the quality of your poetry at such a young age. I think you should expand on this poem. Maybe talk about other things ...
Jan 7, 2010 -
Re: The Dark Goddess [1]
Lol, yeah I caught that in my draft, but forgot to change it here on YWS. Thanks Cassie!
Dec 18, 2009 -
Re: The Banished God-Short Story (Warning: Long)
I am back, as promised. So let's get back to where I left off. “Why the pleasure of mine, of course!” The Hillsman laughed. I think you meant to say ...
Dec 2, 2009 -
Re: The Mansion Chapter 3
I didn't get a chance to read what everyone else wrote, so you'll have to forgive me if I repeat something that has already been covered. Shall we? People never ...
Apr 14, 2009 -
Re: Thirst, Book 1: The Hunter
Here we go, last part... I couldn’t help smiling as I realized I’d covered almost a third of San Pedro, on foot, in a matter of hours between early this ...
Apr 1, 2009 -
Re: Thirst, Book 1: The Hunter
Sorry about the delay, settling into a new home is so hectic. The stinks of the garbage mingled with the harsh feel of the asphalt beneath me. You are such ...
Apr 1, 2009 -
Re: Vashoa's Life
I didn't get a chance to read the other reviews, so hopefully I don't repeat anything. Vashoa started back to the old, ramshackle farmhouse where she dwelt with her ma ...
Mar 16, 2009 -
Re: Of Futility And Shattered Tranquility
Sorry it took me so long to get back to you. But now I am here and I am ready to rip this piece to shreds. (If you don't mind.) ...
Mar 2, 2009 -
Re: S.P. 0.1
That itself wasn’t a surprise, only that they hadn’t yet caught or cornered me. That was about to change, I decided as I took a weary look down the short ...
Feb 24, 2009
